Mother’s Day Grief: How Indiana Donor Network Supports Grieving Moms

MARTINSVILLE, Ind. — For most, Mother’s Day is a celebration of life and family. But for Brandy Heath, the second Sunday in May is a complex tapestry of profound loss and a unique, lifesaving legacy.

Two years ago, just two days after Mother’s Day, Heath’s youngest son, Alex Griffith, died by suicide at the age of 24. A talented musician, a devoted father to a five-year-old son, and a young man known for a smile that could light up any room, Alex’s death left a hole in his family that Heath says never truly closes.

“It’s extremely sad, knowing that I’m going to spend another Mother’s Day without him,” Heath said. “I just try to give myself some grace, spend time with family, and remind myself that we all grieve in different ways and that’s okay.”

A Decision That Saved Six Lives
As the shock of their loss hit, the Heath family discovered a final wish that Alex had quietly made for himself: he had checked “yes” on his driver’s license to be an organ and tissue donor.

“My first emotion was relief that he had chosen to do that,” Heath recalled. “That wasn’t something that us as a family would have to try to decide… he let us know that’s what he wanted to do.”

That one decision transformed a family tragedy into a miracle for six other people. Alex’s heart saved a man in his 60s; his lungs saved a man in his 50s; his kidneys went to two people in their 40s; and his liver saved a man in his 30s. His corneas also restored sight to two individuals.

For Heath, knowing her son’s heart is still beating provides a unique form of comfort. Last September, on the one-year anniversary of their first phone call, Heath finally met the man who received Alex’s heart.

“It’s sad, but it’s also… it gives me an outlet for my pain, knowing that he saved so many lives,” she said. “It gives me something to focus on that’s good out of it.”

Mothers Forever: A “Group Nobody Wants to Be In”
To navigate the “silent struggle” of losing a child to suicide and the complexities of being a donor family, Heath joined Mothers Forever, a support group hosted by the Indiana Donor Network.

The group provides a space for mothers across the state to share stories, discuss their grief, and even celebrate their children’s lives. Heath says the monthly meetings—where they discuss everything from their children’s favorite meals to their darkest days of pain—have been vital to her survival.

“We’re in a group that nobody wants to be in, and knowing that you’re not alone is very helpful,” Heath explained. “Hearing all the ways other moms deal with their loss gives me alternative ways to handle my grief… I’ve learned there is no specific way to grieve.”

Since its inception in 2016, the Mothers Forever program has provided services to nearly 3,000 mothers. This year alone, over 350 women are receiving support through the network.

Words for a Difficult Weekend
As Mother’s Day approaches, Heath’s message to other mothers walking a similar path is one of gentleness. She encourages those struggling with mental health or the loss of a loved one to seek help and to consider the impact of organ donation.

“Don’t hesitate,” Heath said of becoming a donor. “You’ll be saving so many lives, possibly by saying yes.”

To the mothers facing this Sunday with an empty chair at the table, she offers this: “Give yourself some grace. Allow yourself, make room for it, for the grief for a little bit… You’ve lost a part of you, and it’s okay to cry.”

RESOURCES: Indiana Donor Network / Mothers Forever: https://indianadonornetwork.org/mothers-forever/
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: Call or text 988 for 24/7, free, and confidential support https://988indiana.org/