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Former Vice President Joe Biden has done everything in his power to drop to the bottom of an overly-crowded field of Democratic presidential hopefuls, but he just can’t shake that stubborn lead over his competitors.

Frustrating? You betcha! He put a lot of planning into this thing!

Creepy Joe’s Idea List for Losing the 2020 Election:

  1. Invade personal space of females between the ages of 6 to 94: FAIL
  2. Creepily Nibble on Wife’s Finger at Campaign Rally: FAIL
  3. Demonstrate Mental Instability by Challenging Critics to Pushup Contests: FAIL
  4. Raise Concerns About Mental Fitness by Forgetting What City You’re in on Campaign Trail: FAIL
  5. Utilize Bizarre Phrases Such as: “I Will Beat Donald Trump Like a Drum”: FAIL
  6. Admit Publicly that Obamacare was a Failure and it Confused You: FAIL
  7. Verbalize Your Love for Children Jumping on Your Lap: FAIL
  8. Recount The Times You Enjoyed Having the Kids Rub the Hair on Your Legs: FAIL

Come on, people! What’s Joe gotta do to turn you off? No matter what creepy-ass move he pulls, his supporters REFUSE to run into the arms of Elizabeth Warren or Bernie Sanders! What the hell? 

Take my advice, Democrats: Get off the Biden train now! I’m just saying, I’ve seen the rest of Joe’s list and #9 involves dropping a load in his shorts.

Side Note: Isn’t it fascinating how the very same people who expressed disgust over Trump’s “locker room talk” are TOTALLY DOWN with lover of adolescent lap hops and leg rubs, Joe Biden?

Anyway, former Vice President Creeper has the lead in Iowa ahead of the state’s first-in-the-nation caucuses, according to a new poll that also shows former South Bend, Ind., Mayor Pete Buttigieg and Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.) gaining ground on Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass.), who finished second.

According to the Hill, Biden is the top choice among 24 percent of surveyed Iowans in the Focus on Rural America poll released Monday. Biden’s support fell just 1 point since a September poll.

The Chicks on the Right discussed Biden’s inability to lose the Democratic Primary in today’s edition of Speedround with Producer Rob Kendall.