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Five people were shot in the city of Indianapolis last weekend – NOT A WORD FROM MAYOR JOE HOGSETT.

In fact, Indianapolis Mayor Joe Hogsett was absent from public all weekend, save for a few generic tweets about social distancing and the importance of wearing a mask.

This particular “Mask Tip” tweet is especially helpful for those who find themselves suffering from a non-functional frontal lobe:

Very instructive and informative, Joe. Many thanks.

We also enjoyed an update from Joe Monday afternoon about IMPD finally betting body cameras…

Beyond that, it’s been silent.

So where is Joe?

The rumor among those in the know (Okay, just Rob and Abdul) is that “the Mayor is not well.”

Chicks on the Right Producer Rob Kendall explains his half-baked theory in today’s edition of Speedround.