This beloved blog entry is dedicated to the many American heroes who have dedicated their lives to the prevention of domestic murder hornet infestation. You failed miserably, and now we’re all screwed. #NeverForget
Yes, murder hornets are here to stay in the United States. They stealthily crossed our borders illegally in December of last year, lured to the state of Washington by the government’s generous entitlement programs for undocumented invasive species.
While no U.S. citizens have been ruthlessly butchered by these Buick-sized insects yet, experts predict it’s only a matter of time before a toddler is carried off by one and killed. They kill Asian folks all the time.
Knowledge and staying indoors for the rest of your life is the only surefire way to protect yourself.
Here’s What You Need to Know:
- They’re considered a breakfast delicacy in parts of Japan.
- There have been just two confirmed sightings of the Murder Hornets in the U.S., according to the Washington State Department of Agriculture.
- You’re unlikely to die from getting stung by one – unless, of course, you experience a deadly allergic reaction.
- In a typical year, nearly 100 American deaths are caused by traditional bee stings.
- Murder Hornets are expected to multiply in numbers soon enough.
- The fact that bees kill a lot of people and Murder Hornets are still growing in population means you can completely disregard fact #3 on our list.
- Murder Hornets don’t stand a chance against a praying mantis!
Tell the truth, you were expecting the praying mantis to pick its teeth with the stinger at the end, right?
There’s more good news, by the way!
Several Other Animals in The U.S. Are More Likely to Kill You Than Murder Hornets:
- Black Widow Spiders
- Brown Recluse Spiders
- Mosquitos
- Arizona Bark Scorpions
- Rabid Circus Chimps with Wings
Fun Fact: Everything sounds scarier when you put the word “murder” in front of it. Click the segment below for proof of theory from the Hammer and Nigel Show.
