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Evel Knievel jumped the fountains at Caesar’s Palace:

Gary Wells jumped 12 semis at Colorado National Speedway:

This dude rode a Lime scooter across five lanes of traffic on a Dallas freeway:

I now understand what true bravery looks like. Not all heroes wear capes (or helmets, apparently).

Okay, so it doesn’t have quite the panache of the previous two videos. Well, let me tell you something: Every stuntman has to begin somewhere. Evel Knievel probably started out on mopeds and worked his way up from there.

Further, having worked as a stuntman in the film industry, I can attest to the fact that you MUST have a unique angle to gain any worthwhile notoriety.

Fact: People are just crapping on “Lime Scooter Dude” (hope that web domain is still available) because he was the first guy to think of utilizing poorly maintained rental scooters with generic brand all-season tires to amaze the masses. 

You laugh now, but when “Scooter Boy” is earning his millions by jumping fountains in Vegas at a death-defying and carbon-neutral 35mph while you’re sitting in a beige-colored cubicle in Muncie, you’ll be wishing you’d done something worthwhile with your life too, my friend. 

Speaking of entertaining the masses, Nigel and Rob Kendall talked about America’s newest stuntman on Wednesday’s show. If you missed it, you owe it to your family, your country, and your clergyman to listen to the podcast.