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Get to work, American taxpayer! Your elected leaders of government are counting on you to generously facilitate their expenditures on valuable items of pleasure!
Rest assured, all worthy purchases will be made with little to no regard for the welfare and benefit of taxpayers on the whole.
Know that your hard-earned dollars will be philanthropically dispersed on the most succulent lobster, the finest hand-crafted furniture in the world, and luxurious golf carts! Don’t worry; they’re electric golf carts with a very low carbon footprint.
And now, a word from the Washington Post:
The end of the government’s fiscal year usually brings an orgy of spending as agencies look at their budgets, see extra cash lying around, and figure they’d better use it all up or risk it getting cut in the future.
The “use it or lose it” mentality explains why the Defense Department spent $9,241 on a Wexford leather chair, $2.3 million on crab and another $2.3 million on lobster tails in September, according to a study released Thursday by OpenTheBooks.
…As might be expected, the Defense Department was the biggest spender, and the most money went to big-ticket necessities such as fixed-wing aircraft.
But there were also the lobster tail and crab, $163,636 spent on paint brushes, and $7.6 million on workout equipment — including ski equipment for “adults and junior” earmarked to Misawa Air Base in Japan.
The lobster tail purchases in September were a bit more than 10 percent of what the federal government spent on the delicacy the entire year, suggesting only a slightly elevated rate of spending.
But more than a third of the $721,661 agencies spent on pianos came in September.
And while taxpayers bought $1.6 million worth of golf carts in fiscal 2018, 42 percent of that was spent in the last four weeks. The same with the government’s bill for china tableware, OpenTheBooks’ founder and CEO Adam Andrzejewski said.
And now, a word from the Chicks on the Right: