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Lusty, lonely, liposuction-loving ladies with lips of fury have been cooped up for months!

Not that the quarantines have been lifted, the economy eviscerated, and $1,200 government stimulus checks have been deposited, it’s time for drunken divorced babes who are way past their expiration date to get out and mingle!

Such was the backstory of Audra Adams, a Florida woman who made news this week for repeatedly calling the police and claiming that a bar she stumbled into wasn’t following proper social distancing rules.

But according to cops in Melbourne, Fla., Audra Adams is a lying liar-face.

Owners of the Monkey Bar and Grille say Adams was asked to leave after customers complained she was repeatedly attempting to kiss them.

Adams, who clearly just wanted a little loving, called emergency services five times from the parking lot before the dispatcher finally lost her cool after the suspect asked why she was being ganged up on by officers and people at the bar.

“’Cause you’re drunk?” the dispatcher said. “I don’t know.”


WIBC’s Hammer and Nigel have more on today’s edition of “Is This Anything?”

Photo: Audra Adams (Brevard County Sheriff’s Office)