The sheer idiocy of Jussie Smollett’s attorney in her desperate attempts to ‘exonerate’ her client validate every single ‘scum bag lawyer’ joke you’ve ever been told.
Q: What’s the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?
A: One’s a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A: Their lips are moving.
Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?
A: The bucket.
Let’s backup for a minute. Smollett, who is black and gay and a prolific liar, told police he believed his ski-masked assailants were white because of a sliver of skin he saw around one’s eyes. In the end, it was discovered that those supposed ‘assailants’ were acquaintances of the actor – BLACK acquaintances.
Smollett, who continues to embarrass the entire black and homosexual community, is sticking to his claims that he was viciously attacked… by black people… who were buddies of Smollett’s… who he paid with a personal check…
Why was Smollett attacked by his BLACK friends and left with a noose around his neck? Because Smollett is black and his black friends REALLY hate black people.
Okay, but what about that ‘white skin’ that Smollett observed while he was pretending to be attacked… by his friends… who he paid with a personal check… who are black…
Smollett’s attorney, Tina Glandian offered an explanation during an interview on NBC’s “Today.”
“Obviously you can disguise that. You can put makeup on,” Glandian said.
When word emerged that Smollett’s attackers were black (and friends of Smollett’s whom he paid to kick his ass), Glandian said she searched the names of the brothers, Abimbola and Olabinjo Osundairo, online and found a video showing one wearing whiteface in imitation of a Batman villain.
“One of the first videos that showed up actually was one of the brothers in whiteface doing a Joker monologue,” Glandian said. “So it’s not implausible.”
Yes, the black Nigerian brothers dressed up in whiteface for the purpose of committing a racially-motivated attack on a black man… who they were friends with… who Smollett paid to kick his ass.
In other news, Jussie Smollett is up for an NAACP award this Saturday. Sure hope he wins; the poor fella has been through so much.
Hammer and Nigel talk Smollett’s attorney and her ludicrous claims in today’s edition of “Is It Racist?”