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Here’s a helpful tip should you ever find yourself enjoying asylum status in a foreign country: don’t smear your feces on the walls of your protectors.

Yes, while many Americans (toddlers mostly) enjoy a good session of self-expression via fecal artistry, it’s just not an appropriate way to say “thanks” to the folks who are protecting you from extradition to the United States and probable lifetime imprisonment. 

Ignore the aforementioned warning at your own peril. Art is subjective, and not everyone is a poo-casso connoisseur. Julian Assange learned this lesson the hard way. 

Ecuador’s Interior Minister Maria Paula Romo alleged Thursday that Julian Assange smeared his feces on the walls of the country’s London embassy. She also claimed that Assange has ‘terrible hygiene,’ which obviously goes hand-in-feces with the previous allegation. Most poop painters aren’t exactly Howard Hughes on the cleanliness front.

Ecuador withdrew Assange’s asylum status and authorities removed him from the embassy and arrested him, Thursday. Arresting officers wore gloves for the occasion.

Romo told CNN that the administration of former Ecuadorian president Rafael Correa tolerated bizarre behavior from Assange, confirming previous allegations that he displayed unhealthy hygiene and aggressive behavior during his stay.

“They tolerated things like Assange putting feces on the embassy walls and other behaviors far from the minimum respect that a guest can have,” Romo said.

The Daily Caller is reporting that even Assange’s closest associates claimed he had terrible hygiene habits.

“Julian ate everything with his hands and he always wiped his fingers on his pants. I have never seen pants as greasy as his in my whole life,” said Daniel Domscheit-Berg, a former aide to Assange.

Wait. He ate EVERYTHING with his hands and fingers? Does that include soup?

The Chicks on the Right discussed fecal fanatic Julian Assange on Friday’s show.