Hunter Biden, the “smartest person” President Joe Biden knows, loves hookers and blow.
Hunter Biden, the president’s son, is an aspiring filmmaker. He specializes in the “Bob Crane” style of cinema, which involves capturing video of oneself while engaging in various sexual acts with random women. It’s like a “naked selfie,” but at 30fps!
Hunter Biden, a man with no identifiable skill set whose role on the board of a Ukrainian energy company involved “nothing unethical,” according to his father, Joe Biden, had his laptop stolen by Russian drug dealers.
Hunter Biden, a man who regularly associates with drug dealers, prostitutes, AND the President of the United States, enjoys moonlight conversations in the nude with prostitutes.
We know all these things because the Daily Mail has obtained a four-minute video clip of a naked Hunter Biden from 2019 in which he reveals to a ‘lady of the night’ that he’s worried about being blackmailed.
In the video, spawn of Joe shares the following information about the night he had his laptop stolen:
Hunter: ‘You know what I just thought of something. When I was in California [inaudible] before I met you. I was with these guys. The one guy was, not like you anyway.
‘Primarily my source, ok? And I spent fu**ing crazy amounts of money. I went to Las Vegas and he said it would be one day. I made him promise me it would be one day. I hate Las Vegas.
‘And so literally after 18 days going round from penthouse suite to penthouse suite [inaudible] four different hotels, and thousands of dollars. I didn’t even know. He had my credit card, he said we got half off, I was like great. Then I found out it was $10,000 a night. I’m like what.
‘And each night he’d be like ‘there’s going to be so many people here, crazy fu**ing party’ and each night it’s nobody.
‘Hold on I’m peeing.
‘And so that’s when I went into the pool. Into the tub. In the hot tub, above, in Palms that hangs over the side [Inaudible] more than I usually do, way more than that [inaudible]
‘And I went out to the hot tub by myself, which hangs over the edge of the fu**ing top floor, with glass, it’s ridiculous.
‘And so I’m sitting there and that’s the last I remember. And I don’t ever pass out, ever.
‘I wake up and the only people that are there are Miguel, the guy frantically running round gathering things up, ok – and Miguel, and Pierce, this guy, his friend.
‘So anyway, and they had kicked everybody out. And they had cleaned up the entire place, everything ok? And they were getting ready to leave, and I woke up. And there was this Russian 35-year-old, really nice, pure brunette.
‘[Inaudible] I don’t know how long. She refused to leave until they – she refused to leave and they wouldn’t call an ambulance. And they didn’t know whether I was dead or not, at first.
Hooker: ‘ They couldn’t just come over and check [inaudible]’
Hunter: ‘They checked to see if I was breathing. When I finally showed signs of breath, at first I wasn’t breathing, I was in the fu**ing pool face down, they don’t know how long.
‘And she told me that they don’t, they were like ‘we thought we’d get everybody out, because you know we didn’t want, if we had to call, we didn’t want everybody…’ And she went no. They demanded that [inaudible]
‘Two months before… [inaudible]
Hooker: ‘Continue with the story please.’
Hunter: ‘Anyway my computer, I had taken tons of like, just left like that cam on. And he would always put in a passcode and all that, you know what I mean? It was fu**ing crazy sh*t. And somebody stole it during that period of time. He did all this kind of like pretend search and sh*t.
‘The last thing he sent me was $2,000 worth of stuff in an Uber and he sent me a [inaudible] with the Uber, and I had to send the money to a cash app or something….just waiting
Hooker: ‘…In Las Vegas [inaudible]’
Hunter: ‘I think he’s the one that stole my computer. I think the three of them, the three guys that were like a little, like group. The dealer and his two guys, I took them everywhere. Fu**ing everywhere, crazy out of your mind sh*t.
‘The Russian [inaudible] she’d walk out with a fu**ing bathing suit in her hand.
‘They have videos of me doing this. They have videos of me doing crazy fu**ing sex fu**ing, you know.
Hooker: ‘How long ago did this happen?’
Hooker: ‘So it would have been out already if they-‘
Hunter: ‘No no no, because my dad [inaudible] running for president. He is, he is, he is. I talk about it all the time. If they do, he also knows I make like a gazillion dollars.’
Hooker: ‘They’d try to blackmail you?’
Hunter: ‘Yeah in some way yeah.’
Well now, that doesn’t sound like a national security risk in the slightest, America!
Fun Fact: This alleged stolen laptop makes a total of three computers reportedly misplaced by Joe’s son.
Hey, wanna see the video?
I don’t want to judge, but I think Hunter Biden needs to invite Jesus into his heart.
Mock n’ Rob have more in the clip below.