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It’s official, Indianapolis residents, taxpayers, and those recovering from stabbing and gunshot wounds! The Indianapolis City-County Council has finally addressed the most dangerous challenge we face: second-hand smoke.

They did it with force… They did it with swift legislation… Beginning next month, smoking will be banned in Indianapolis parks.

Now we know what you’re thinking: Isn’t the risk of stray bullets hitting innocent bystanders a bigger health risk than smoking? Wouldn’t it save more lives to tackle the city’s soaring homicide rate? Didn’t stabbings and shootings kill more Indy residents last weekend than Marlboro Reds?

Yes, but the City-County Council is about control, not solving problems. Plus, Mayor Hogsett can’t blame IMPD for second-hand smoke, nor are there rampant rumors about his addiction to nicotine.

So take note, Marlboro Man: Beginning July 1st, you’ll face a $100 fine if you violate the new smoking ban at Indy parks. Do it again, and you’ll be hit with a fine for $200 or more. Do it a third time and we’ll force you to live on the East side.

On the upside, the Mayor finally lifted did something he should have done months ago: put an end to Indy’s mask mandate… but not until July 1st.

Hammer and Nigel have more in the clip below.