Listen Live

Knocking on doors while not wearing pants and preaching the Word of God is rarely considered an effective means of winning souls to Christ. This is due, in part, to a number of contributing factors:

  • The lack of pants.
  • The disjointed and confusing message that is communicated by preaching about turning from sin and living a life of modesty while simultaneously exposing your genitals for all to see.
  • The social stigma that is often associated with ambushing a complete and total stranger while nude.
  • The uncontrollable screaming that results when inadvertently getting your “junk” slammed in the framing of a lost soul’s front door.
  • The ensuring encounter with law enforcement professionals who will likely be wearing pants AND carrying collapsable batons.

Bottom Line: Wear pants when preaching the Gospel – even on hot days.

Helpful Real-World Example: A naked man knocking on doors at a South Florida apartment complex last week was shot by someone who then called 911 to turn himself in.

No, we don’t know where on his person the naked man was shot.

The man was carrying a Bible and knocking on doors Wednesday at the Sunshine Garden Apartments when he was shot, Pembroke Pines police Major Al Xiques told the South Florida SunSentiniel.

Destiny Williams said she was ready to move out after the naked man knocked at her door about 15 minutes before being shot.

“He was knocking on doors and when you open it he was like, ‘You want some of this?’ pointing to his private area,” she said. “That was crazy.”

Helpful Tip for Pantless Prosyletizers: If you simply MUST preach the Gospel in the nude, you’d best arm yourself with more than just the Word of God.

A.D.D. Moment: Those Ring! doorbells must make things really difficult for the Jehovah’s Witnesses.

Hammer and Nigel have more insight into this fascinating story of human survival in the clip below.